She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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