just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize