I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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