So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
