Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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