she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
We are all done wearing pants today
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
