Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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