So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I know her cup size but not her name....
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
