it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
