She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
