i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
