i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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