Quick, to the slutcave!
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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