I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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