Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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