don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
