um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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