i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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