God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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