Whatcha textin bout Willis?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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