we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
