I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
