I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm gonna have a badass scar
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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