oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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