you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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