I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize
