I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
