i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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