We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
