so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Do vagina's smell?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
