btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
