You're my little dorito
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
