Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Randomize