sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize