I feel like I'm in dance class right now
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize