his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
