Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
