You can't motorboat a personality
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I'm getting married
To pizza
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
