Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
