she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
