next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
