OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
