Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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