i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
