Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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