I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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