I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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