SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
