im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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