he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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