if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
